Potholes Are The Devil
I grew up on a dirt road in the back woods of Southern Missouri. Going to “town” was an event and for my family it required all four of us to load up in the truck for the weekly outing. This was before the day of club cabs, crew cabs and SUVs. There weren’t three rows of seats for my big brother and I to fight over – nope, my assigned seating was right next to my Daddy and thus right next to the steering wheel. Everyone else in the family refused that seat due to straddling the gear shift and my Dad’s seemingly endless stream of flatulence, but in my opinion it was the best seat in the house! Dad always let me steer on the dirt roads – oh, what a thrill it was.
Now on our dirt road there were potholes the size of a full grown milk cow. I had a grand ability to nail every pothole dead on with the front tire and the rear tire, sending all 4 of us bouncing to the roof of the truck cab. It wasn’t intentional. I could see the potholes ahead but I just couldn’t seem to navigate around them.
I haven’t driven those dirt roads in years, but I have a feeling those same potholes are there, haunting some other young driver’s navigation skills. While I live smack dab in the middle of a large city now and highways and cement sidewalks have replaced my beloved dirt roads, I still find there are potholes along my path. These potholes (or holes in my sidewalk) are disguised as harmless little choices and behaviors which lure me in and keep me from reaching my goals in life. This insightful little poem by Portia Nelson illustrates how our potholes keep us engaging in the same behaviors over and over again.
Chapter 1
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost . . . I am helpless.
It isnt’ my fault.
It takes me forever to find a way out.Chapter 2
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But, it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.Chapter 3
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in . . . it’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.Chapter 4
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.Chapter 5
I walk down another street.
Here’s what a pothole looks like: Pressing the snooze button when you know you need to get up and get going. Skipping breakfast and eating a cheeseburger for lunch. Letting the laundry pile up until it’s overwhelming. These potholes draw us in even after we declare we will never fall into that same hole again. Those potholes rob us of our self-esteem and confidence and zap us of our vital energy.
What does your pothole look like? Is it procrastination, Little Debbie snacks, the snooze button, the internet, gossip, TV or clearance racks? What chapter are you on? Is it still not your fault, are you falling in day after day and someone else is to blame? Are you finally sick and tired of being sick and tired? Are your eyes being opened and you recognize these habits, choices and patterns of thinking are causing you to land at the bottom of the same darn pothole time and time again?
The most common pothole for a Mama is “there’s not enough time in the day to take care of me.” You know what Chapter 1, 2 and 3 look like . . . you go to bed late, you wake up early, you’re exhausted, your family needs you. By the time you cook, clean, work, clean and cook some more you only have a few spare minutes to pass out on the couch in front of the TV and then start it all over again. POTHOLE!!!!!!!! As a young girl steering my Daddy’s truck along the dirt road, occasionally my Dad would grab the wheel moments before we nailed another pothole and save us all from whiplash. Consider this your moment of saving grace, an experienced driver taking the wheel for a moment to avoid that same pitfall again.
You don’t have to live the first three chapters throughout your life. You weren’t meant to remain in the pothole. Your own denial tells you “I can get away with this one more time.” “I can lose weight next month.” “I don’t really care if I ever fit in those skinny jeans again.” But your Chapter 4 reads like this . .
My alarm sounds early.
I am sleepy.
I get up any way.
I exercise, I clean, I cook, I work and I find time to make it all happen.
And Chapter 5
I have plenty of time in my day to do everything I wish.
I am happy and healthy.
A life worth living and loving awaits you, outside of the pothole!!!!!!! Sharp turn left Mama, there’s a pothole ahead and we’re not falling in it again!
habits, potholes in Goals, Healthy Choices
Reader Comments (10)
Thank you! I will begin steering away from those potholes tonight!!!! Gotta make time for myself, despite EVERYTHNG else I'm doing. Thanks for the reminder. Love you! XOXOXO
Well if you should fall in one of those potholes my friend, I will be there to pull you out until you reach Chapter 4, then 5! I believe in you!
I sure keep finding those potholes myself...not just one of a Krispy Kreme donut, but ones that are on every single journey/road I'm taking. Excuse after excuse...justification after justification. Definitely a new way to think about the self-sabatoge and internal thoughts that go through my mind when I justify the excuses! Thanks Pamela! I could use an easier route with less potholes!
Thank you so much for this. This is exactly what I needed today... there are Potholes everywhere in my life...but the eating out pothole will be MISSED today!
Kathy ~ you can do this! You're in Chapter 3 recognizing it is your fault - you're not blaming anyone else and Honey let me tell you, THAT is what will set you free!!!!!! Write a beautiful Chapter 4 and move on! :)
Courtnie ~ YES!!!!!!!!! Welcome to Chapter 4 - you are going to love it!
My husband actually introduced me to your site. (I don't know if you remember JJ McCLeary?) Anyway, this is one of the best suggestions he has me made. This article really highlighted how I have been living my life, and I want to be the person who avoids those potholes in life. Thank you so much for the encouraging words. They have ignited a fire inside me that refuses to go back into those holes.
Holly ~ Of course I remember JJ and I'm excited to get to know you! Let the fire burn sister, fan the flame and stay clear of the potholes that have kept you down. Write your book exactly as you want it!!!!!!!! Are you on our FaceBook fanpage as well? So many exciting things happening there!
I'm not sure what chapter I'm on, but at least I've got the book open now! Wow what an insightful message!!! Thank You!!!
Rebecca ~ Supporting you on this journey!!!!!